Dear Editor,
With respect to Navindo Tinsarran’s letter (‘The problem is the standard by which we measure ourselves,’ SN 2.7.08) in response to my letter (‘Women do respect themselves,’ SN 27.6.08), I believe I was very careful to note that it was exactly his view that “dressing is one contributory factor to rape” that I wished to further explore with the writer. In my humble opinion, it is exactly this simplistic view of things that causes the writer to fall into the trap and use an age-old claim that the sexual violation of a woman can be brought on by what she wears, and that somehow, therefore, she is responsible for what she gets. This argument is as offensive as it is old, especially when it is clear to see what some may use as the logical follow on: a woman is beaten because she has brought it upon herself. It is instructive that nowhere in this discourse is there any mention of a man’s responsibility not to engage in violent and abusive acts.
It is also interesting that the writer chooses to add to his argument by quoting from the Bible. I believe that any reasonable person, brought up within the general norms of our culture – one that in my experience stresses the need for decency and kindness and above all dignity of the person, understands what is meant by the term ‘modesty.’ I do not accept the writer’s position that in judging oneself by our standards we set out to deceive ourselves. Unashamedly, I do have my own standards by which I judge myself. These are standards that are heavily influenced by the very Bible of which we speak, as well as influences from significant people in my life. Without doubt some may see the “hearts of men/women” as “deceitfully and desperately wicked.”
Personally, I am not into self-flagellation and thus do not subscribe to this way of thinking. I still am interested in reading about the writer’s views on the raping of women in Islamic countries (where the mode of dress is no doubt modest), as well as what he would posit as the other contributing factors to the rape and abuse of these women.
In closing, I would like to wish the writer all the best and thank him for the opportunity to engage in this albeit brief discussion. I wish more people would do so.
Yours faithfully,
Lisa Thompson
