Dear Editor,
The just concluded elections for Mayor and Deputy Mayor of Georgetown were an absurd pretence intended to create a respectable appearance. It was obscene beyond words.
The Mayor seemed confident of her imminent coronation well decked out in costume jewellery and dark shades.
Fake seemed to be the theme word for the occasion.
The Mayor’s green outfit was probably an accidental subliminal message to the party faithfuls nervously gathered around the table. Not to be outdone, the master of ceremonies, the Town Clerk, was dressed in black. After the formalities the master of ceremonies got down to business and opened the floor to lay out the methodology for nominating the mayor.
On cue, Oscar Clarke popped up and said he wanted voting to be done by a show of hands! Another party loyalist quickly popped up and seconded the show of hands motion. Another councillor from one of the small parties put forth the revolutionary notion that voting should be done by secret ballot. Twenty odd apostles of the dominant gospel quickly raised their hands in opposition, some with chins tucked to chest, cognizant of the flashbulbs going off around their heads. The secret ballot was quickly defeated with only six persons voting in favour of it.
The magic carpet ride continued as the master of ceremonies announced the methodology of voting had been settled and opened the nominations for mayor.
Before the last syllable left his lips Fraser nominated Chase-Green. Clark popped up to second it and Garrett jumped onto his feet to close the nominations before Clark could take his seat. Another apostle quickly leapt to the heavens to second the closing of nominations.
Chase-Green, Clark, Garrett and the Town Clerk were the ones who travelled to Mexico looking for parking metre magic.
The master of ceremonies then quickly announced, “I wish to declare Mrs Patricia Chase-Green has been elected by the Councillors of Georgetown, Mayor elect for 2017!”
The apostles erupted into wild applause and table banging. Another victory for democracy, another victory for democracy. The smaller party members sat around sombre and stunned.
The master of ceremonies announced that the mayor elect would now be escorted to her throne and everyone stood as a female constabulary officer in a brown uniform guided the mayor elect to her throne. Like a proud father, the master of ceremonies bellowed, “Madam let me be the first to congratulate you”.
Fresh off the gruelling campaign, the Mayor elect kept it short. “Thank you Town Clerk. First let me thank God for the greatness he has bestowed upon me.”
The master of ceremonies wildly signalled the Mayor that now was not the time for thanking ‘God for the greatness he has bestowed upon me’ part, but the wild applause had already erupted from the apostles. Three persons were nominated for deputy mayor but the oxygen was quickly being sucked out of the room by the heavy breathing of the apostles.
Lionel Jaikarran was the choice for deputy mayor and before voting began one of the female apostles could be heard shouting, “Majority, majority!” The outgoing deputy mayor had to evacuate his seat to make room for Jaikarran whom the master of ceremonies invited to the head table amidst loud banging and glorification. The master of ceremonies kept shouting, “Please, I’ve not finished announcing…please, I’ve not finished announcing…”
I reached the bottom of the stairs and met a gaggle of city constables waiting anxiously for action. One pointed at me and shouted to her colleague, “Duh is not the rastaman we arrest and rough up that time?” I ignored them and kept on walking. I could hear them laughing as I headed out the gate.
The vendors’ union was on the pave protesting. I made some small talk and one of the union members said, “It don’t matter who dey up in deh, dey gon have to deal wid we out hey. In the streets.”
Yours faithfully,
Mark Jacobs
