“Excuse me, I am crossing over because by the time I walk around I may lose the seat and I really need the seat,” she said as she lightly held onto my shoulders before quickly grabbing the seat next to me.
I told her it was quite fine as I knew how I felt when I finally got my seat to rest my weary legs. Around us was a bevy of mostly excited children but there were some adults too and the place was almost congested.
We were in downtown Toronto, Canada at a popular tourist attraction and as she sat next to me, we immediately struck up a conversation. It started about how tired we were following children around; I had my two sons and she had a little boy with her.
I agreed when she commented on how entitled children these days believe they are and how they at times show little appreciation for the efforts made by the adults in their lives.
At that time, I believed the little boy was her son and as we spoke, I observed that he and my boys had hit it off and they were playing together. I told her I was visiting from Guyana and she quickly told me that she was originally from Barbados, had lived in the US for many years and has now made Canada her home.
I then learnt that the little boy was in fact her nephew.
“I wanted him to have a good holiday, so I sent for him and he is going back tomorrow,” she said with a sad smile.
I figured she was going to miss him and that made her sad.
“His mother died last year, my only sister,” she continued, explaining why she appeared sad.
“Wow, that must have been hard for you,” I said.
“Yes, it was, and I still can’t get over it. … We were close. We spoke almost every day and now looking back I am very happy because he [her nephew] knew me because we used to video chat, so it was not hard for him to come and stay with me.
“But you know when I had to go home and bury my sister it was not easy. I have brothers, but no sister and we are not close like how I was with my sister,” she continued.
As we chatted persons continued to mill around us, and we kept eagle eyes on the boys. But I felt there was a need for this sister to speak to me and I commented that I had seven sisters (yes that is right) but no brothers.
“Oh, you are so lucky,” she said and at that moment I did feel a little lucky. I love my sisters. We don’t always get along but I have mad love for them.
“You know bringing my nephew up here it was if I felt closer to my sister, it was like I was doing it for her but really I was doing it for me because I wanted to feel that connection to her.
“My brothers and I are not that close, one of them brought up my nephew and he is staying with me right now. And you know the two of us had it out this morning. I had to let him know a few things because it is believed that I am rich, but no one knows how hard I work. He came up here with [she gave the figure] and spent all on buying things to take back for his friends. Right now, he has two overweight suitcases, and now he wants me to lend him money.
“Because I said no, he was very upset, saying how I mean. So, I had to let him know that he came and spent an entire month with me, and I never asked him for anything, he didn’t have to buy food or anything but now he know I mean,” she said.
As she spoke, I remained silent and allowed her to offload.
“I had to ask where was everyone when I was going to school and still had to slave? It is not that I mean but I had to work hard, and I still work hard to make it and I can’t just give money away like that.
“Right now, I am not even really speaking to my mother and like she told him something and I had to sit him down and set the record straight. I hope he understood what I was saying. He looked like he understood because at one point he said he didn’t know.”
She stopped at that point to check on her nephew and then introduced him to me. He gave me a toothy grin before scampering off to play.
“In the end I just gave him 600 Bajan dollars I had. He can use that when he get back because he wanted the money to use when he went home. I had that money from since last year when I went for my sister’s funeral. I had the money and said I would have given it to somebody but in the end, I got so upset with everything that happened and I brought the money back with me. I gave him because it is of no use to me,” she said.
She did not go into details as to what got her upset while she was in her homeland and I did not ask as I felt she should be allowed to share as much she felt comfortable.
“But it must be good for you and your boys to be visiting…” she said, changing the entire direction of the conversation.
I told her indeed it was a good getaway especially for my sons who were thoroughly enjoying themselves, compliments of their grandfather.
We chatted a bit more but nothing personal before she indicated she wanted to take her nephew to get something to eat before heading home as they had to rise early the next morning.
As she left, I gave her my number to add me on WhatsApp and I also gave her my relative’s number in Canada, and I observed her storing them in her phone. I deliberately did not ask for her contact because I wanted to give her a chance to reach out if she felt the need. After all she was the one who really shared and maybe she just wanted to offload on a stranger and then move on.
That was fine with me as I did not want to force her to communicate with me. She then invited to me a function over that weekend, but I told her I was unavailable.
She left and I never heard from her again and I must say I expected this. Sisters usually don’t talk about their pain and hurt to the people who are close and for her to open to a total stranger must have taken a lot. I guess she felt it would have been awkward communicating with me after the tone of our conversation. But I was a glad that I lent a listening ear to a sister.
