If we are truly open to them, we will gain lessons in life from the usual sources – parents, teachers, religious leaders, writers, etc. – but also from chance encounters or some uninvited wisdom or event that comes to us, rather than our going to it. The lesson can be about honesty, or being truthful or kind; it can be about love for animals or concern for the environment, or bonding with family, or the power of friendship, and the lessons can take their time in arriving, so that, in my case, it was as a teenager growing up in New Road, Vreed-en-Hoop that I learned the importance of respect and honesty in a memorable conversation with my mother Zepherina, and here I am, some 70 years later, and a stirring example on the subject of love between a man and a woman lands on me out of the blue. It came through an encounter with an Amerindian couple, Lionel and Noella, who spent about a week in our house in Oleander Gardens while Noella was getting medical treatment at the Georgetown Hospital Outpatient Department. The couple had come here through the efforts of my wife Annette Arjoon-Martins, who had learned of Noella’s situation.
Annette recalls: “Two years ago, on a visit to Karasabai, I had purchased some amazing letterwood carvings on display there and learned the artist’s name was Lionel and he lived in Parishara. As Lionel was also carving the Golden Sun Parakeet out of my letterwood, my son Alex, who was producing a birding video, decided to include him. One year later, when my daughter Victoria graduated with her degree in film studies, I decided to visit Lionel for a custom-designed piece as her graduation present. At that time I met his wife, Noella, who was ill and in pain from a muscular illness, and I arranged for her and Lionel to be brought to town compliments of Air Services Limited. Dr. White, at Public Hospital, did a number of tests and Noella was diagnosed with Parkinson’s and placed on medication.”
In the days following, during the treatment period Annette refers to, the two visitors were staying with us in Oleander Gardens, and we could see improvements immediately in Noella. What also came across vividly during our time with them was the remarkable quality of the love for each other that these two people share. It stood out like a sign over their heads. In everything they did, Lionel and Noella showed time and again this unswerving mutual devotion in the relationship they shared. They would reach out to each other when walking, or simply sitting side by side on the couch. They would share a private joke, or talk about something in their life in a joyful manner, sometimes teasingly in good fun. I never heard a harsh word pass between them – not once. This couple would silently and naturally hold hands and say grace before every meal – a ritual they never missed – and they would routinely share food as they ate. It struck me after they had gone back to the Rupununi, that in all the time they spent with us, although I never heard the word “love” used between them, they were constantly in that state with each other. It was not a stand up and shout declaration, but while I don’t know all the details of their life it was evident from across the room that these two people had found a unique level of oneness and connection that had taken them over. It was a natural and ongoing state; it never wavered. Every time we were venturing out, Lionel would open the van door for his wife, and usher her comfortably in her seat, before getting in himself, and at our destination his attention ritual would also follow. In a store in town, or getting a snack on the move, the same level of attention and closeness between them was there. I was mesmerised watching them. It was truly a lesson for me how naturally and almost spontaneously their feelings were on display, even when strangers were around. This was them; this is how they lived; this was the real deal. It was plain to see. There are other examples of happy relationships among the couples I know in Guyana, but the level displayed here was exceptional. One had to be taken by the experience. It was unique.
Noella will be on medication at home for at least four weeks and will come to the Public Hospital again in November for a follow-up visit. Before they returned to Parishara, I took time in a quiet moment to tell them of the impression they had made on us – even our helpers remarked on it – and their response was as I expected: a shy smile and a grateful nodding of the head. Ultimately, this experience was riveting for me. It has been quite a while since I have seen a couple displaying such devotion and connection for each other as naturally as breathing. It was an uplifting thing to see, so sincerely and naturally taking place.
I don’t know if Noella and Lionel will see this column, but I hope that others in their circle who see it will pass it on to them as evidence that their devotion to each other is also a heart-warming inspiration to others, many miles away, who have witnessed it.
