“People would always say that when you don’t have children to mind then things must be really easy. Once you working and you don’t have children to send to school and so on that you have to be making it. The reality is far from that; we are all struggling and for most of us if it was not for help from relatives we would not make it.”
These are the words of a 48-year-old public servant who lives with her retired partner. We converse from time to time and I, maybe like many, believed that things were not be too tough for them as they have no children and have both worked all their lives.
However, that day she further opened my eyes to the struggles Guyanese – even those who have worked and contributed to this country for years – have to just make it from day to day.
“If you want to own you own home and not pay rent is a struggle,” she noted. “For years we building this house and as you can see it is nothing big and fancy. First we had to struggle to get the land then it is to get the money to pay off for it. Yes, both of we working then, but we had rent and other bills to pay. We money put together barely make it. Is a little help from here and there and throwing box hand that help us to pay off.
“Then when that done is the building. How much money the bank would lend you and how long you getting to pay off. It was a struggle, but we get the house build and you still have to pay mortgage. He retire and still paying a mortgage, how much you think is he pension?
“So, you know people would look at us and say we making it. We get we own house and no children. But let me tell you, every cent we get does done spend before we get it. We don’t have no real savings and I does pray that none a we get really sick because I don’t know how the doctor bill paying.
“We have to ration we self how we buying the groceries, making sure we pay the bills and when that done is nothing lef. We can’t say we want to go out and have a nice time, you have to budget for that and leave out something. Now with COVID we not going anywhere but is same way the money have to spend. We go done pay the mortgage before I retire and I happy for that so at least we would not have to worry about that,” she told me.
We have had many conversations and there are times when she seeks to advise me on life and how to make certain decisions. I am always pleased to speak to her because of how candidly she shares her struggles and triumphs over the years.
I am not sure what triggered her to speak about always being perceived to be doing well because she does not have children.
“My colleagues, they would tell me how I don’t have no problem with money because I don’t have children or that I have me own house. Sometimes I does get upset, but other times I does just allow it because I know they going through some rough times. And of a truth, if I hungry then is just me and me husband hungry and we is big people. But I don’t know how it would feel if we and children hungry too. I guess it would be harder,” she said.
“But when I look at the expense it does be hard. Like right now things in the house need fixing but we just don’t have the money and is not like we would get a bulk of money or anything like that coming. We now have to bust we head to find ways to get things done.
“Life in this country ain’t easy. You could work for your whole life and still struggling. I know people who work and when they retire they didn’t even have they own house, and it was hard for them because even with pension they could not pay rent like normal. I see a lot of me colleagues end up like that.
“And people would tell you about budget. I does try to do it and it does be hard for me much less people with less money. What you budgeting when the money done spend before you get it,” she pointed out.
“I does struggle but I does help out a little. Like you know if me friend come and say she don’t have no money to go home, I does, you know, if I get one last thousand dollar I would give she five hundred out of it.
“And I don’t complain. I just know I have to make do with what I have…” she trailed off and seemed to be in deep thought for a while.
“You know when you come to think about it, the whole children thing must be get a little truth to it. I does struggle but I know if I had children it would be harder for me. Is more food I would have to buy. But it is just that I does be upset when people just think I have no money worries because I don’t have children.
“I does want tell them sometimes I have to save up for me old age because they might get some help from their children when they old but me and me husband we don’t have no children to help we out when we get old, so we have to save up money for that time. But guess what? We can’t even afford to save no money, no money at all. As soon as we get the money it gone.
“I just want people to understand that children or no children we all struggling and even if you working things still bad. We does have to try and do what we have to do and live the best we can live. That is what I does tell me husband, let we just do we lil thing and hope for the best,” she continued.
I know for some her struggles might sound like nothing as so many persons, especially single mothers, are really finding it hard right now. COVID-19 has made hardships ten time worse and some people just can’t seem to make it. But it is important for people to understand that as she put it, children or no children people are struggling and not to believe that because people are childless their lives automatically become easier. This kind of thinking can also make it seem as if children are burdens, which is just wrong.
I know it is difficult managing finances for many especially when money is limited and as a result budgeting can seem like something foreign. But just in case you are reading this, and you are thinking about how to budget the American Bank advises that you first take note of your income as the first step to creating a budget is to identify the amount of money you have coming in. Second, keep track of your spending, as this would help you to make adjustments. Third, set your goals and then make a plan and adjust your habits if necessary. Keep checking in, the bank advises, as it is important to review your budget on a regular basis to be sure you are staying on track.
It is not easy, and budgeting would not work for everyone as it might prove to be too much with all the other issues you may be facing. But if you can try it, it would not go to waste. We are facing some tough times and do need to make some adjustments.
