After serving the United States Navy for 23 years, Michelle Simmons decided it was time to retire and give back to society, especially to the land she once called home, Guyana. It was out of this desire and the memory of the urging of her now deceased brother that Carl’s Care, a non-profit organisation, was born. It now provides assistance to survivors of domestic violence.
Simmons has not stopped there. Now equipped with a doctorate in counselling and psychological studies, she works with incarcerated women at a prison close to where she now resides in Suffolk, Virginia, United States.
Where she is today is a far cry from where she began. Simmons recalled that when she joined the Navy she enlisted as an undesignated seaman, the lowest pay grade of an enlisted sailor without a specific military job, which saw her at one point picking up garbage. When she retired 23 years later, she was a senior Naval Officer. During those years, she completed masters degrees in National Security and Strategic Studies and Counselling Psychology. In May this year she graduated with her doctorate.
While she has been assisting survivors of domestic violence since 2006, it was only in May that she officially registered Carl’s Care as a non-profit organisation.
In a virtual interview with the Stabroek Weekend, Simmons shared that while her brother Carl, a former school teacher who died in a vehicular accident, had encouraged her to do more, it was while doing her dissertation on Guyanese women who survived domestic violence that she was propelled into action.
“These were survivors and their stories and their drive and all that they did to leave their abusers motivated me to make this official because I realised that there is much work to be done. So individuals with my background in psychology volunteer our time to do something… and domestic violence is my passion and that is how I got started,” she told this newspaper.
Though she left Guyana at the age of 19, Dr Simmons said she is first and foremost Guyanese born and raised and it was always about doing something for her land of birth, hence her decision to focus her dissertation here where she visits twice a year.
“Because Guyana is my native country, I feel that I have the expertise and I can put that to use. It is sort of reaching back…” she explained.
While acknowledging that there are organisations, such as Help & Shelter and Red Thread, that are doing work in the area of domestic violence here, Dr Simmons said there is a need for more to be done as domestic violence remains a major scourge in Guyana.
For her, it is about what can be done to help the women, children and men who are affected by domestic violence. While the number of men affected might be very small, Dr Simmons said they exist and she will always help if there is a need.
“Instead of sitting back and watching and reading the news articles about this person that was negatively affected, I am doing something about it… I am just doing my part as it starts with the individual,” she posited.
She explained that many times the assistance is given in secret as while the survivor may have escaped she may still be living in fear and as such she has points of contact here, inclusive of someone in the military, who have been assisting her for years.
This individual, she said, helps to identify the needs of survivors whether it is financial, food or clothing and she sends at least six barrels a month to Guyana and the items are distributed to those in need.
Dr Simmons’ Facebook page has a number and people are encouraged to call and leave a message and once this is done someone would make contact to ascertain what the specific need is. She gave the example of a young woman who is going through a divorce and needs assistance with lawyer’s fees. Once it is ascertained that it is a legitimate request, the need will be met.
“Although we are very careful, very strategic in our connections. I have two individuals who are in Guyana who feed me the information and that is how we know who to distribute to,” she explained.
She gets support from others to this end and while as she previously indicated that she started the work in 2006, it was when she retired from the Navy in 2018 that she decided to put all her energy into the organisation as she was no longer tied to her military career. Before, most of it was done out of pocket but now she receives donations from many people. Over the years she assisted hundreds of survivors.
“I tell my donors don’t give anything that you wouldn’t use yourself [and] to treat everyone with love and respect,” she emphasized adding that she has volunteers who go through the items to ensure they are of good quality.
Humble upbringing
Simmons, a former student of St Rose’s High said she is very proud of her humble upbringing in Guyana as she was a part of a family of eight who lived in Bagotstown. She is the youngest of six children and she recalled that her older brother, Carl, was an Agriculture Science teacher who always encouraged her, as the youngest, to pursue higher education and also aim to do her best.
It was after he died in the accident in 2006 that Simmons started giving back to Guyana and this was further expanded when she did her dissertation.
As a retired member of the Navy, Dr Simmons counsels women at Hampton Roads Regional Jail, a local prison, on a voluntary basis. She counsels women who are in jail but affected by domestic violence. She has a schedule and she counsels clients for not more than an hour as she is mindful of over saturation. It is done weekly but not every day as Dr Simmons said it is important that self-care be practiced as she has her organisation also to focus on and she does not want to “spread myself too thin”.
She said her line of studies “just came” as she was always passionate and she did the research and “it aligned itself with my studies”.
Speaking about the Navy, she said, she started off “picking up trash and I worked my way up to driving ships and being a logistician…” After 23 years she decided that she had given enough to the Navy and she wanted to focus on other things and she retired.
“I love every moment of what I do,” she said when asked if she regretted retiring from the Navy.
“I no longer work, I am now serving… I give back to the community. It is about reaching back and helping someone,” she shared.
She recalled as a child, meeting her Scouts leader who was Guyanese but raised overseas and who had returned to Guyana to give back, and being so impressed. It was that coupled with her brother’s “voice in my head” that took her down the journey she made this far.
As she approaches her 49th birthday Dr Simmons, who is the mother of four adult children, said the questions she asks herself are who can she help and how can she serve.
She is married to Commander Alexander Simmons, who is still on active duty and while he is away, she stays busy volunteering.
She advises victims of domestic violence, the moment they realise they are being abused to figure out what their resources are and get out. In terms of resources, she is referring to what available help is there through the various organisations which can assist the survivor to leave.
“The abuse never gets better and it never ends, you will never be able to change the abuser unless he or she wants to change. Find a way to tap into the resources that are available to you; get yourself out of the situation,” she advised.
She said there are men who are victims but they do not speak up. “We have men who are being beaten by their wives, that is a reality but we don’t talk about it. A man wouldn’t want anyone to know that his wife beats him but it is real and I have served survivors who are men,” she said.
Simmons has also written and published a book, A Lesson in Trust which has chronicles her journey in life this far and has been described as an “incredible journey of hope, resilience and faith”. She recalled that as a child, reading kept her mind occupied and so writing became her passion. She described the book as speaking to her young life and overcoming adversities and her path from Guyana as a woman of colour to a position of authority in the US Navy.
Carl’s Care can be contacted on 757-774-5143 or by email: carlscarellc@gmail.com
