Life has changed drastically and will probably never be the same again for Shameeza Bhagwandat, a single-parent mother who lost her only child in February this year after he was involved in an accident.
In a recent interview with the Sunday Stabroek, Shameeza said the past three months have been an emotional rollercoaster for her. “I have a chair set, a three-piece set…..I sit on the long one every day. I sleep here (on the chair) in the night, I wake right here…..Sometimes I would sit until 10 in the morning, I would get up brush my teeth and then I would have a shower. I would come back right here, tidy up the chair and I sit right here. If I have 15 minutes sleep for 24 hours that is enough. I cannot sleep,” she said.
In fact, Shameeza is yet to accept the fact that Christopher is dead but rather lives every day with the hope that he will return. “It’s like I am still expecting him home. Up to yesterday (Friday) I was telling my mom, my son is going to come….It doesn’t feel like he has gone and left me. I cannot imagine it. I don’t believe. Even though I did a funeral for him and I buried him, I don’t believe it,” she explained.
The grieving woman said that even though time has passed, she is finding it difficult to cope. “…Nothing means anything to me….There is no happiness for me. It could be (no matter) what I get in this world right now, nothing would match. My son was my happiness. Everyday this is what I am doing. Every day I am crying,” she lamented.
Christopher Bhagwandat, 21, and his girlfriend, Sheereda Persaud, 16, lost their lives on February 2nd after the car which they were in was involved in an accident during a high-speed chase by the police on the Mahaica Bridge.
The accident occurred around 11am. At the time, Bhagwandat was the driver of motor car, PNN 8852 which was being pursued by police vehicle, PAB 3143 after he allegedly drove away after being stopped at a police roadblock.
The force’s vehicle was driven by Corporal Carmichael. He was accompanied by three other ranks: Constables Tucker, Johnson and Sam.
“According to Corporal Carmichael, as they were pursuing the vehicle on the Mahaica Bridge, the driver pulled right and collided with the force vehicle, which collided with the bridge rail and both the force vehicle and PNN 8852 collided with motor canter, GJJ 9151” which was proceeding in the opposite direction, the police had explained.
Another motor car, PAB 8222 which was driven by Derick Dickson, 29, of New Amsterdam, Berbice and which was behind the canter also sustained damage as a result of the accident.
The accident which was captured on nearby CCTV footage raised questions as to whether the police pursuit was warranted in this case, more so since it is still unclear why Bhagwandat was being pursued.
Exactly one month after, Corporal Lawrence Carmichael was charged in relation to the accident and placed on $1.5 million bail.
Fill the space
The accident occurred on Shameeza’s birthday. Reports had indicated that Christopher had driven to Berbice to collect Sheereda so that she could join them in celebrating his mother’s birthday at their Mon Repos, East Coast Demerara home.
Months before Christopher died, his father had passed away. After Christopher’s death, Shameeza was left alone. Her mother, who resided overseas has since returned here to stay with her. She also has a few other relatives who are currently staying at her place temporarily.
However, according to Shameeza no one can fill the space of her son. “Nobody cannot fill that space for my son,” she said.
Christopher was the breadwinner of his home and took care of his mother following the death of his father. Shameeza also operated a shop which she said she has since closed.
Shameeza explained to Sunday Stabroek that she doesn’t have the strength to continue running the business. “I can’t do anything, I can’t. I just close it. It’s there but I can’t handle it anymore. I don’t have the strength…I sit here whole day looking at the picture of him, looking at memories of him and that is all,” she said.
Presently, she said she is surviving by God’s grace. “I don’t have any income coming in from nowhere…..Whatever, I am coping, I am trying. One, one good samaritan sometimes come in, not every time or every week….and I would make do with whatever I have,” she added.
Shameeza said the death of Christopher has changed her life completely. “He was my only child, my breadwinner, the love of my life. He was my everything. I don’t know how I am going to make it out without him,” she said.
She noted that most days she cannot even eat. “Nothing go down right now. Some days I eat and drink nothing at all,” Shameeza cried.
Today is the Mother’s Day and it will be the first Shameeza will be spending without Christopher.
She said she doesn’t know how she will get through the day. “I don’t know how I am going to spend it. I can’t say how I am going to spend it. I never spend Mother’s day without my son,” Shameeza said.
She reminisced that when Christopher was alive he spent all of his leisure time with her. Especially today, she added that he would ensure that she was treated with a fancy meal and enjoy the day to the fullest.
“I want to encourage mothers out there to stand up for your children, look out for them. Be that mother…..Look at your children, it could be once, look at your children, go all out for them…Be the person that you have to be,” Shameeza urged all mothers.
