“It really break my heart to see how he cry and if it was not for pride I would have break down tuh and cry. I don’t know how parents do it but it was the one of the hardest things I had to do since I became a mother,” she sighed.
I am sure you might be thinking that something devastating happened to this mother and her son. But it was just the first day of school for the little man. Many mothers can remember that first day, how anxious we were and how we wanted to join our children in crying. Some of us may have done so.
Last Monday was the first day of the new school year and there were many nervous parents, well mothers more than fathers, I believe.
“I was preparing for this day long. You know how long I bought everything? And we use to talk about it and he seemed so excited. Days before, he wanted to put on his clothes and shoes. One time I even allowed him and it was hell to take if off. So I said to myself all would be well. Now today, as soon as we approaching the gate, this child start one crying. It was just so hard,” the mother of one told me.
When I caught up with her on the third day of the week, her son had still not settled.
“Every morning is a bawling and to tell you the truth is like I want to give up. Everybody keep saying it would get better, but I want him to stop crying. The teacher told me that today he did not cry as long as he did on Monday but that was of little consolation,” she continued.
I asked her if she had taken him to the orientation.
“Girl I did and you would not believe it that child did not cry for those two days and that is why I thought it would have been good when school open. When I go to pick him up is like he is being let out of prison, that is how he behaves,” she said almost close to tears.
“I just hope the crying stops soon because it is really hard for me… I try to talk to him, you know, and ask why he is crying so much, because as parents, you know, we think the worse – maybe the teacher don’t like him. But I know it can’t be that and the more I try to talk to him sometimes it is the more he cries.”
I spoke to another mother who said she was forced to run after her daughter who took every opportunity to sprint in the opposite direction of the school.
“I did done prepare me mind because since from orientation she crying and crying,” she related. “But for me it was not so hard because me son was de same thing… I harden me mind because they have to go school and I know she would stop. The first day – well we don’t live far from the school – I walking and when we meet like halfway, this child just tek she hand out me own and start running back for home. If you see me running behind her,” the mother said laughing a bit.
“She do it like three times and the funny thing is that about two or three parents did going through the same thing. So, we had to Usain Bolt behind them children. And you know the teacher told me that as soon as me back turn this girl stop crying so that is why I not worrying.”
I spoke to another parent whose child did not cry but she knew he was having issues the first day of school.
“It is a new school and I know he is missing his old friends and so but we had to move and I more nervous than him. He not saying anything but I just know. I could see it in his face and I could just cry for he, because he has to now settle in back. Last night he tell me what if he don’t know the work so I had to tell him is the same work he use to get at the old school,” she told me.
“When he came home after the first day he told me he did not make any friends and how it hurt me because I could just imagine him alone sitting and I only praying by the end of the week he get at least one friend.”
When I went to pick up my younger son, I observed many nervous parents of first graders and I knew how they felt having their children move from half-day school to a whole-day session.
“They in the big league,” one parent said to another, but his laughter sounded very nervous.
Some of the little ones jumped into their parents’ arms as soon as they saw them but the more independent among them refused to even have their hands held as they stoutly moved forward; haversacks on their backs and lunch bags in their hands. Some parents attempted to relieve them of the backpacks but they refused and I smiled because I knew their parents must have been pleased and felt comforted.
First day school jitters are always going to be a thing, whether it is your child’s first day of school or first day in a new class.
“I miss the teacher and I even miss the classroom,” my younger son said to me after the first day of the school year.
I told him it was the same class and he had his old friends.
“It is not the same thing. I miss the teacher and this teacher said we have to do more work because we in a bigger class,” he said sadly.
I felt for him and I just had to continue the conversation and inform him that the work will get simpler with time once the concepts are explained and he understands.
To all those nervous sisters out there, just know that this too shall pass. You will have to prepare for it again next year. I suppose with every phase of our children’s lives, nerves are going to be around but we just have to chin up and be a source of support for them. Of course it is not limited to sisters but brothers too (I used sisters because of the title of my column).
Remember to talk to your children about their feelings and you can also help them by going over the class list so that they don’t forget anything. Give them tips also on how to make friends. If the teacher allows it (some teachers can rightly be overwhelmed by parents contacting them) check in on the children’s progress so as to calm your own nerves.
Breathe, relax and support, support, support your children and all will be well. Best of luck to all children for the new school year.
