“For me that is the worst job ever. I had to do it because I need money but if I had another choice that would never be for me. I don’t know about other people but maybe I just get the wrong people to work for but when I done, I does feel like nothing.”
These are the words of a 45-year-old mother of four who has been a domestic worker, on and off, for many years. She is not employed at present and I recently suggested that maybe that is the route she should go. Today’s column reflects her reaction to that suggestion.
“It is like some people does feel like you is a slave or something,” she told me. “If you see work dey want you to do in one day and fuh lil bit a money. And is not that only, is how them does want talk to you like if you is nobody. Right now, I rather be a guard than do domestic, it is just that I don’t want leave me two young children alone in de night.
“I remember one time I went to work at a woman. This woman want me wash, clean and iron all in one day. She didn’t have no washing machine and is like three tubs a clothes and by deh time I done, I tired like hell. Was like three hours a washing. Then you didn’t want to see the place condition; nasty. Oh and I must sweep de yard to and then iron. It was like five o’clock and I not finish and tired to de bone. And this woman want give me $3,000 for all a dem work,” she explained to me.
The scenario described by the sister was indeed shocking to me but I have heard horror stories of how sisters are treated, mostly by other sisters who hire them for domestic purposes. As this sister spoke I felt her pain over the manner in which she was treated.
“I could tell story after story about how people does treat you in this life when you have to work for them. I know I don’t have education and that is just me lot in life but I does try to tell me children to take them education because I don’t want them to end up like me,” she said.
“Is since I young I doing this because me mother didn’t have money to send we to school so from a teenager I cleaning people house. When I get married is the same thing because me husband didn’t use to work fuh enough money to mind we. Now he gone and is me and them children alone and I does got to try but it ain’t easy.”
In all her experiences though there was one that was positive.
“I used to work with a woman. She didn’t really have plenty money but I know she just need help because of the children and she work and so. It used to be two days a week and this woman would try to start the work in de morning before she leave and if she come home and find me, she would help me. She would talk to me like if I is a real human and whatever lil she had she would give me.
“In the morning whatever she do for breakfast she would leave for me. I telling you, this woman was not rich or anything but is how she used to treat me and talk to me sometimes, I used to feel I could work fuh free and all. She had to let me go because she say she lose one of she jobs and this woman cry when she tell me. It was like I did losing me job but I was feeling more sorry fuh she than me how she cry.
“But that was like me only really good experience. One time I was with a family who had money but girl is how de wife and children used to treat me. The money was a lil good, but is like a slave camp. Everything these people use to leave fuh me to do and is like they used to mess up deh place fuh spite because them didn’t have to clean it.
“Sometimes you go and it was like a war zone. And this woman used to want order me; like if she have anything to tell me, is like she talking to a child and always have a problem. Them children did rude bad and want talk to me anyhow. The husband, well he never used to be at home really and even when he deh around he ain’t used to really say nothing. In de end I just lef de work because was like I used to frighten to go to work every day because I don’t want hear nobody quarrel and say this wrong and that wrong,” the sister said.
I asked her what she would want to say to people who hire domestic help.
“First, I would say to them: treat we like humans. We not no slave or anything and treat we like we is adult and have sense. Sometimes they talk to you like you stupidy or something. Ow man nah because we don’t have education we don’t have sense,” she replied.
“And pay people properly. Is work we working. We gat children to mind and bills to pay to, so if we working with you, you have to pay we. When you get you lil bonus at Christmas time, give we a lil something extra too, nuh. We want nice up we house to, don’t just give we dem things you want throw away and think we happy fuh it. Don’t have you children talking to we anyhow. We is adults and them must respect we; not because we working fuh you.
“Fuh me I would tell them just be nice to people that is all,” she added with a sad smile.
I am happy to report that since I last spoke to this sister she has gotten herself a job – not as a domestic helper – and she is earning.
I hope her experience would remind sisters who have domestic workers in their home to treat them kindly. Remember it is not just about the money, you can pay them a hefty sum but if you make your sister feel like nothing then the purpose would have been defeated. If you have domestic help check yourself and question whether you have been doing right by her.
As I have always said in this space, just be kind. You never know how life changing your act of kindness can be. Likewise, your unkindness can cause serious mental and emotional issues for another person. So be kind, simply treat people the way you expect to be treated.
