For the first few years after we are born, we spend most of our time simply learning how to live. We learn to do things like walking, talking, and asking for the things that we need. However, as we grow a little older, we begin to realise that life entails much more than just sleeping or eating. We discover abstract concepts such as death, love and happiness. More importantly, we find that the world around us is made up of many people just like us, who have their own routines, personalities, and desires. Then, just as we enter the period of adolescence, we notice that these people who live around us have the ability to perceive us and make judgments on who we are and the way we act.
After this point, we begin to desire social acceptance and we try to mould ourselves to fit into the general expectations of society. We listen to what those around us think about us and try to correct the flaws they observe. Generally, we learn to grow out of the need to shape ourselves to fit into the expectations of those around us. However, for some people, this changes the way in which they view themselves and can affect them for the rest of their lives. This is why we have taken to teaching young people to live the way they would like to and ignore what other people think and say of them. We show them that not caring how the world sees them can help them to focus on developing themselves in ways that matter. Although this method of thinking can be useful for young people to ignore negativity and not let harsh criticism affect their ability to function properly, we must reconsider whether it is helpful for them in the long run.
Imagine finding yourself in a completely dark cave with no visible way out. Imagine that you are hearing several voices around you giving you different instructions on how to escape this cave. However, most of these voices seem to be in conflict with each other. Do you think it would be wise to ignore the voices altogether and work blindly to find a way out, or to pay more attention and pick out the instructions that seem to be legitimately helpful? In a situation like this, it is easier to believe that all the voices are useless. In truth, it might be more helpful to simply spend some time trying to understand what the voices are saying before making such a decision.
At an age where children are fed different opinions from several sources about everything, including how they should speak and act, the clothes they should wear, and even the things they should eat, it is almost as if they have become infants again and are now relearning the way they ought to live.
This period could be confusing and frightening for anyone. During this time, we should not be teaching children that they should completely ignore what others think of them. Instead, we should be showing them how to correctly process and respond to the input of opinions and ideas.
They should understand how to take in the ones that align with their values and use them to their advantage while discarding the ones that do not.
Caring about what people think of you is not necessarily a negative quality. Doing so can help an individual to build connections and become more empathetic of the people around them. Under the pressure of a million voices giving you advice and their opinions, it is quite tempting to block everything out. Life, however, is much like a dark cave for those who lack the luxury of experience. Trying to find your own way out might work for some people, but leaves others tired and lost. This is why, instead of completely ignoring those voices, we should try and listen to what they say. We just might find that one of these voices show us the way out and into a better future.
