Sometimes, it is easy to forget how unique every individual is. If we go through life in a blur, the people around us begin to blend into one homogenous body – much like a sheet of snow spread out over a large, flat field. However, this perception is just as incorrect as it is unfortunate. It would take a truly discerning view for one to discover that this seemingly uninteresting sheet of snow is made up of millions of small snowflakes that are so special that not a single pair of them are alike.
Identity is an important part of what makes us human. Snowflakes are unique because every one has a different path from the sky and towards the ground. Similarly, every single one of us has experienced life in a different way, starting from our birth to the very moment we exist in. Thus, it would simply be impossible for us to share an identity with anyone.
Regardless of how personal and beautiful your identity is, there would have always been a period of growth and adjustment where you were not completely sure who you were. After all, uncertainty is a natural part of youth.
So, what results when you tell an uncertain person that something will certainly happen? What will occur when you nudge someone who is already struggling to find their balance? What happens when you place an identity in the hands of someone who has not yet found their own?
The answers to the questions posed above are quite simple; they will believe you, they will fall, and they will take the identity as their own, regardless of whether or not it fits.
Recently, I discovered the placebo effect. The placebo effect is a phenomenon whereby your body responds positively to treatment or medication that has been designed specifically not to have any effect on you. For example, an individual with a migraine may experience relief after consuming a ‘placebo pill’ that is just made of sugar. An important part about the occurrence of the placebo effect is that individuals experiencing it are not aware that the treatment or medicines that they have been given are designed not to have an effect on them. The sheer amount of trust that they have on their treatment and doctor convinces their body to heal itself or reduce pain. The placebo effect is often temporary or not applicable for serious illnesses, but is quite effective for symptoms such as pain, nausea and fatigue.
On the other hand, there is also the nocebo effect, whereby the same treatments or pills that should not cause any physical changes result in several negative side effects. If a person is told by their doctor that a pill would result in severe side effects, they are likely to report those side effects regardless of whether or not the pill truly causes it. Once more, this is because the body responds to the facts that the mind has accepted and believed.
In both of these cases, we see that simply being told by a trustworthy source that something will happen is likely to increase the chances of it happening. This is applicable for both the positive and negative sides.
Young people who look towards the adults in their life or their peers for guidance about their identity should never receive sure-set information about what they are, because no one can truly predict someone’s capabilities and limits. Instead, they should receive guidance on how to introspect and discover the answer by themselves.
We often hear that we are our own limit and we are our own driving force. However, we must always remember that we have the ability to affect whether those around us limit or drive themselves too.
