I will be away from the office for the next few weeks and will be unable to conduct interviews but I still wanted to bring
the experiences of women to this space. Therefore, I will share some previously published columns that I believe are still
relevant. Some people might be reading them for the first time as well. This was published on November 13th 2022.
“For two months I wasn’t seeing my health and I was thinking, ‘Lord, I hope I am not pregnant’, because I cannot deal with that right now. But you know another part of me was saying it is menopause and I can tell you I was not unhappy I was almost gleeful really.”
As she said that last sentence there was no gleeful expression on this sister’s face because as she told me earlier she was feeling sick and weak and like she wanted to give up on life.
“Right now, is only God keeping me going because all I want to do is lie down and don’t get up,” she said at one point.
She was relating to me how she has been feeling for the past few weeks since her menstrual cycle returned and apparently did so with a vengeance.
“Well you know I enjoyed the two months without seeing it and I was feeling so good and then one day it just come and I was like, ‘Oh Lord, it is back’. And you know it was flowing and I had to be using so much sanitary napkins and I am thinking ‘eh eh it making up for them last two months,’” she said.
“But then like this thing didn’t want stop, one week, two weeks and now is 19 days since I bleeding and I know this can’t be right. Now I know I had to come to the doctor but is like I was afraid. You know the saying that our minds can be our worst enemies? Well that was it for me because is like for me I already get cancer or that a baby dead in me all kinds of things that keep me up late, late at night.”
As the sister, who is a mother of three and in her mid-forties, spoke I sensed how scared she was even at that point.
“I start thinking I don’t want to have to die now and not like this. But I came out to see the doctor and I don’t really have money so is to the public hospital emergency I went. I am feeling so sick but I had to wait about three hours before I get to see a doctor and I was like almost passing out so they had to give me saline,” she continued.
“But thankfully the doctor was nice. I really couldn’t take the place though, is like it look so nasty and like confusion it made my skin grow. Anyway the doctor see me and she order some tests and so on and I had to wait a long time again till about nine o’clock the night. She said the tests not really showing anything, just that my blood count was low.
“But she told me to go and do a proper ultrasound and come back with results to her. So I had to find the money I didn’t have and go and get it down and then she look at it and referred me to the gynaecologist. Now all this time I still bleeding and feeling so weak. I only like to use natural things, nothing pharmaceutical, but I had to buy some tonic and start drinking because of how I was feeling and I was still bleeding.
“So the morning I went early to see the gynaecologist and the nurse go look at me and say that I didn’t get any date and give me a date 13 days away. Well I just start crying. I say to her that I am bleeding and she was like ‘yes but we does deal with dates here’ and I start crying more because I am coming from out of town how she tell me to come back at that time? Suppose I dead in the meantime?” she asked, not expecting an answer.
“Well I don’t know if it is the tears or what but she told me to go outside and sit down and when the doctor finish seeing the pregnant women they would call the other patients. I was the first they called after all the pregnant women finish. The doctor was so nice, she was thorough in asking me questions and listening. She said the ultrasound didn’t show anything really that should be causing the bleeding and she believe is menopause.
“I was like, ‘oh gosh hear that word again, this is what it is like?’ She told me she would give me an injection to ease the bleeding and if it don’t stop completely, to come back. She also said once I am not bleeding she wants to do a biopsy just to make sure everything is alright.
“Is the same nurse had to give me the injection and this time she was so nice and kind and telling me how there are no tears anymore. I was like looking at her and wondering how she could be so unkind to people because when people go to the hospital they’re at their lowest and you have to think about that.
“Anyways I leave the hospital feeling much better and the bleeding ease and I going home now with me tonic and I pray that all is well. I know I am getting big and that I have to watch my body and you know for the last few months I did a lot of hard physical work and I think that must be contribute to it and all. I forgot to tell the doctor about that.
“I am feeling better and the bleeding almost stop so I am going to go and come in another few weeks and go back to the doctor because I want to ensure that everything is okay. This old age thing sometimes, [she laughed] can really get to you,” she added.
Even before I said it to her she said, “yea, I know I am not really old yet but the body saying otherwise”.
She smiled and we parted company.
I wanted to share this sister’s experience just to once again highlight why people are sometimes hesitant to go through the public health system. It can be so tiring and burdensome at times that it can make you even sicker. Some sisters who cannot access private health care will ignore certain signs just to avoid the public health care system.
Health workers in the public system should be kinder and listen to patients first before making decisions. That nurse did not even ask if the patient lived out of town or what was her health issue but gave her a date 13 days away.
Sisters, I implore you not to ignore any signs and to take care of yourselves, you never can be too careful especially when we are getting older.
And I just wanted to give some tips again about menopause.
According to www.mayoclinic.org, menopause is a natural biological process. “But the physical symptoms, such as hot flashes, and emotional symptoms of menopause may disrupt your sleep, lower your energy or affect emotional health,” the website said.
But there are many effective treatments available, from lifestyle adjustments to hormone therapy.
In the months or years leading up to menopause (perimenopause), a woman might experience these signs and symptoms:
· Irregular periods
· Vaginal dryness
· Hot flashes
· Chills
· Night sweats
· Sleep problems
· Mood changes
· Weight gain and slowed metabolism
· Thinning hair and dry skin
· Loss of breast fullness
Take care of your bodies, sisters.
