There is much fear and anticipation when it comes to pregnancy and bringing life into this world and understandably so. I would imagine for women in particular the burden is even more intimidating as it’s the woman’s body that physically carries the foetus for nine months. The responsibility over her health and that of the unborn child has even caused some to withhold news of their pregnancy from friends and family. Even before the child is born, expectant mothers are riddled with guilt over things that are way beyond their control and over their human ability to make mistakes. For those planning pregnancies, authentic first-hand experience reviews can be hard to come by as no one ever wants to ever be seen as the mother that got it wrong. In addition, there are cultural and social phenomena that parents (especially West Indian parents) in general have always known best.
As my biological clock ticks on, I have been on an information collection rampage, on how best to prepare and always with hope that the next article I read will be the end – an article that will finally give me all the information I will ever need.
There are endless things to worry about: from toxic cleaning products to scented candles. It almost feels like your entire life was harmful pre-baby. From my therapist and one of my long standing friends who also happens to be a Licensed Nutritionist Specialised in Women’s Hormonal Health and Fertility and a new mom, here are a few tips I managed to collect that seemingly helped me to feel less overwhelmed:
From my therapist
Try not to feel guilty about being on antidepressants or even needing mental help after the birth. For those who already suffer from varying mental health conditions, big life changes such as birth and death can exacerbate them. These matters are to be discussed primarily with health care practitioners.
If your resources allow you, a consultation with a psychiatrist specialized in pregnancy and maternal care would also be useful to have additional certified opinions.
Joint couple sessions before conceiving can be handy especially if there is an existing condition. It can mentally prepare the couple on strategies to cope should a flare up occur. Because this is such a vulnerable time being on the same page or arriving on the same page in healthy neutral and moderated sessions helps to lessen the emotional and mental work that lie ahead and if anything can help both parents understand how the pregnancy and birth can bring new changes and moods in their lives separately
From my friend – a new mom and Licensed Nutritionist Specialised in Women’s Hormonal Health and Fertility
A balanced diet ideally should be implemented prior to even trying to conceive to ensure the body has the correct balance of nutrients for both the mother and the baby.
According to a Nipper study, an international trial whose participants were women ranging in ages from 18 to 38, 90 percent of women who tried for a baby lacked essential nutrients. It is not enough to think that vitamins and pills will magically set you perfectly on the right track so don’t entirely depend on them to do all the work
Help is so much needed especially in those first weeks and for doting family members simple suggestions can work your last nerves even when it comes well intentioned. There are so many generational lashes that will take place that sometimes just for your own sanity it may be better to outsource that help if you are in the position to. This allows you to have an authentic first-hand experience with help but without the emotional labour of internalising the opinions of loved ones.
Subscribing to a few birthing and preparation classes is not only useful for the loads of theoretical and practical guidance but because you get to build a community as you find yourselves partitioning off this new part of your lives.
While the baby showers and colour-themed gender reveals are the easy glossy bits to get carried away by, it is really the physical and emotional preparation that will really sustain us through our first months or years even. Perhaps what we need now is a party dedicated only for birthing and pregnancy tips swapping.
