There is nothing more terrifying to me than going for a routine pap smear check. The image of the metal speculum and the manoeuvring from my first examination still replays like a bad memory. It feels very much like embracing voluntary torture. Even without seeing it I could already feel the discomfort that is driven by its coldness.
Pap smears are one of those things that despite how much you mentally prepare for it, it still finds a way to shock you and doesn’t seem to ever really get better with time. And yes even with a plastic speculum the discomfort is still there because the pressure felt from the speculum as brushes collect cells from your cervix doesn’t change.
This is my fourth examination in my lifetime. The first one, I created so much fuss for the nurse taking the sample that she refused in the end and referred me to a doctor who then had to talk me through the entire procedure. The second one, I begged my husband to just stay and hold my hand which if anything made me more anxious.